one-two-three, one-two-three

I have fallen in love with dancing lately.

real dancing. not just the stand-around-making-it-up-as-you-go-depending-on-how-the-beat-makes-you-feel type of dancing(though that's alright, too--not saying that kind isn't fun).

I'm talking ballroom dancing. waltzes. swing. salsa. tango. the cha-cha.

I especially like the cha-cha.

there is a dance studio in town. it looks a bit like this:

     { picture borrowed from one of the Ballroom Utah photo albums }

I've been to this place a bunch of times now for dancing lessons, and once for swing night. why did I not seriously learn to dance sooner? I could've been really good at it by now. as it is, I have learned the salsa from Corey (with whom I got to dance the most fabulous cha-cha ever), some fancy waltzing from Seth, and a bit of old-fashioned swing from a handful of random people who were at the studio last friday.

one of those random fellows was named Scott, and as he was leading me through a very basic Charleston, he said, "don't be afraid to follow yourself. you're doing pretty well already." I had stopped in mid-twirl, frozen and unsure of what I was supposed to be doing and where my feet and hands should be. obviously it messes both of you up when you do that. no one can even pretend that you're dancing any sort of dance if you aren't moving.

his advice in that moment still makes me smile. there was a compliment buried in it, of course. but that's not the reason I will always remember that dance and those words. is it bizarrely sentimental of me to twist them out of context and apply them here to life in general?

in my waltzing lesson last month, I learned that great dancing takes thorough physical confidence. despite the fact that I'm the girl, the follower, the one who gets spun and twirled and dipped, I need to give my partner, the leader, something to work with. I need to push back. I need to make sure every inch of me is exuding an I know how to waltz vibe. there needs to be a little friction. pressure. cooperation. flexibility. fearlessness becomes a foundation for all of these other things. if you don't move, nothing cool will happen.

I'm not going to belabor the metaphor here. life. dancing. yep. all I'm hoping is that all these dancing lessons will somehow infuse me with the courage to start following myself. even if I have to fake that thorough confidence, I'm pretty sure the proper footwork will get drilled into my head eventually.