Wednesday, November 28

delicate drawings

traditions change sometimes. is that sad? if you used to wake up every day to watch the sun meander over the horizon, but now you don't... that could be sad... unless it isn't, because after all you don't want to get hung up on mopey nostalgia. (but sometimes you might. a little.)
everything is always changing. even the most steady traditions probably morph a little bit, just like the phrases in a game of--what is it, chinese whispers, or telephone? whichever it's called. nothing we can do can keep change at bay.

all the things you've been handing down to your future self, no matter how precious or carefully handled, might just get lost or forgotten one day. that doesn't mean you're a bad person. it doesn't mean you have to regret the broken streak. it also doesn't mean you can't pick those things up again.

always is an elusive thing, possibly just as fragile if not more fragile than never. I might not always be a morning person. I might not always have access to all the information I do at the moment. I might not always have time to read and blog. I might not always be looking forward to a certain kind of future. I might not always be able to doodle during church or make my annual Christmas cards. I might not always have consistently comfortable and familiar spheres in which to play.

things change. today was the first sunrise I've been close to for months. I haven't redecorated anything during a holiday break for a few years. the whole do-some-yoga-every-day resolution faltered in April or May, if I remember correctly.
but none of this means I can't start waking up earlier again and writing out more yoga-filled agendas for myself.

a few notes for the record:
I am making Christmas cards this year. they are snipped and stacked and ready for the attention of my new gluesticks.
I don't plan to abandon my reading or my blogging.
the doodling during church has no reason to be abandoned that I can tell.

2 comments:

Janeheiress said...

"I may not always have time to read and blog." What a depressing thought!

amelia chesley said...

thankfully it's just a might, and a very very distant fuzzy non-threatening one... I think.