rich people and what they get away with

14 pairs brand new $35 black trousers.
two dozen or so brand new $70 white caterer jackets, with shiny gold buttons.

brand new, shiny, painfully narrow, black, plastic-like, non-slip shoes.

2 racks of brand new mini champagne flutes.
40 cute miniature desert spoons.
3 brand new, heavy glass pitchers

5 round tables, each consisting of:
1 large, white round cloth
1 satin green runner
at least 12 little sparkly candle things
1 tall glass vase with some exotic flower in it
8 official utah state university chargers
24 knives
16 large forks
16 small forks
8 desert spoons
8 bread/butter plates
8 white, folded cloth napkins
8 printed menus
8 elegantly handwritten namecards
and 8 crystal goblets filled with lemon slice and ice water

40 silver and white chairs

13 waitstaff
1 catering captain
and the entire kitchen staff, including prep cooks, salad chefs, and 4 miscellaneous office people

and then six beautiful courses of very expensive food (abbreviated here, to save space), arranged in oh-so-fragile arrangements on 40 plates of various sizes:

lobster rilletts with grapefruit emulsion.

avocado pancake with brunoise of carrot

salad of endive, baby spinach, and red oak leaves, dressed with blueberry pomegranate vinaigrette

hot rolls and butter molded into the shape of a rosebud

sorbet of papaya and prickly pear in champagne

roasted quail stuffed with juniper berries, wild rice, asparagus tips, and yellow wax beans

explorateur cheese with fresh figs and toasted hazelnuts

dark chocolate violin filled with vanilla bean mousse and berries, and chocolate torte of mocha butter cream

coffee, tea, and whatever else you would like to demand of the waitstaff.

notes:

utah state university is a dry campus. this means no alcohol allowed anywhere.

ha.

the president keeps it in his university-owned house on the hill.
the chefs keep it and cook with it all the time.
there were bottles and bottles of it backstage at the new recital hall (to which we owe this entire extravagant feast). and although cheffrey (his name is Jeffrey Wooley, he's the head chef, we call him cheffrey. yeah. really.) says there is more alcohol in a teaspoon of nyquil than there is in the servings of champagne we handed out last night, it is champagne nonetheless.

speaking of champagne, and the sorbet, and those cute tiny little spoons, and the brand new champagne flutes... one was broken. one was spilled.
not too bad, considering the stress of the evening.

total set-up time: 5 hours

i didn't even know you could eat oak leaves. but they were actually good.

total serve time: 2 hours

explorateur cheese is nothing but moldy cow cheese. ick. cheese is gross.

total cleanup time: 3 hours

no, i was not there for all 10 of it, but i have friends who were. i came in 1.5 hours before serve time.

no, i didn't get to taste all six of those courses.

no no no, i did not drink any champagne--though i could have.

my favourite bit was the lobster. good gracious it was delicious.

i wonder if we will ever use those mini champagne flutes again.