what you want

today I am going to test-drive this car. I know it looks sorta dirty and old-ish, but I like it. so far.

I've been poring over classifieds for two weeks now, looking and looking for a car that is neither too old nor too new, neither a piece of junk nor too fancy and expensive. my red notebook has been filling up with lists--neat little charts of years, makes, models, mileages, and phone numbers.

some small thing I have learned from all this list-making and phone-calling: if you know it's something you aren't really going to want, don't waste your time. and if you know you want it, don't worry. you'll find a way there.

this whole treasure hunt for a decent vehicle has been dragging itself through the back of my mind, tearing up the yard and making big splintery holes in the garden gate. with any luck it'll be over soon. then I'll find some new thing to stress me out. like paying for car insurance.